Rubber Lungs

by Gregory Connors

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
2.
02:29
3.

about

A series of poems written while attempting to navigate the post-educational system.

Cassette available at significantother.storenvy.com

credits

released February 7, 2014

All lyrics by Gregory Connors.
Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Cj Lohnes.
Artwork by Seth MacLean.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Gregory Connors Halifax, Nova Scotia

I've become enchanted by words.

contact / help

Contact Gregory Connors

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Safe In Sound
I've become enchanted by words. The expression of concepts and meanings that I've only thought, but never heard. The use of sounds and syllables to orchestrate a song more beautiful than anything I've ever played on my own. I don't want to be alone, but lately it seems like everyone else has something to say. Like, everyone else has a complaint and theirs is always worse than everyone else's in some way. Don't take this wrong. I'm not saying that I'm any better. Just that I need to say what I have to say so I'm not forgotten and fade away because I've lived my life so far more conceptual then anything substantial and I think its time to break that cycle. Time to write down words, scream until I'm heard, and hopefully put a piece of me back into every person or place that I've ever loved and left in this world.

(I'm not ready to die)

If you understand this, then this if for you. There's nothing in this world that words can do, but they can sure lead to action and, my god, I hope they do.
Track Name: Tailored
I sat in a mall yesterday. I sat alone and watched the people go by, holding hands tight, like they were afraid to let go because they know that, if they do, they're bound to lose one another. But its the culture! The buy one get another, just in case the first one ever starts to falter. But it's that kind of mentality that creates a self fulfilling prophecy, so why bother? And sitting there, watching those people go by, it made me start to think about the people in my life, the places I've been, the things that I've seen, and how every individual is a product of their own combination of these.

See, I know this girl. I know this girl who told me that she never wants to get married. She says the idea of love is only a construct put together for fairy tales and movies, like we somehow out grow these and growing up means letting go of fantasy. See, she watched her parents play different roles. Saw her mother’s emotions exposed when her father was out taking off someone else’s clothes. So how is she to believe that every guy she meets won’t make that how her story goes, when that’s what she was taught at home?

I know this boy. I know this boy who gave up his entire world for a girl. Put his dreams into a sock drawer so that he could uphold hers. He waved goodbye as she travelled across the sea, waiting patiently for her to return because he believed that they were meant to be. But his ideology of two, soon turned to three, as passion began burning down doors that neither had considered before and as those few months became more and more, his hormones won over, craving the moans of a whore, leaving each questioning the concept of monogamy that they were both raised to adore.

So, realistically, I blame Disney and pornography for the most miserable human beings that I've ever come to meet. Yet I still have a tendency of naming all of my songs after the places I've been, after the things that I've seen, in an attempt to commemorate the people that I met in each, convincing myself that it was all a metaphor for something else, regardless of each contradiction that I've grown to see. But that doesn’t mean I can't pretend, because it's these friends who have taught me the difference between who I am and who I should be. Taught me the importance of honesty and the value of clarity, so hopefully they'll understand the sincerity behind each time that I say "I'm sorry for who we've grown to be."
Track Name: Water Under The Bridge
This year, I was reminded of passion by watching someone work hard for their own creations, being happy with what they did. That's something I haven't seen since I was a kid and it made me think, in these past four years, what happened? I used to have friends who'd write songs, singing on and on about the world that we were going to change, wracking our own brains for solutions to whatever ever problems came because we knew that we could solve them together, whatever they may. Now its become so normalized for me to spend all of my time around people who hate their lives. People who spend more time forgetting than learning, prescribing their own highs, rotting on the inside from lack of food and no exercise, for their bodies or their minds. I can't blame them for wanting to die, but I know now that I no longer want to be a part of that life.

This year, I became frustrated with my own mind for filling pages with words that still don't mean a thing to me, for working hard towards a degree for a future that I can't see and I don't know if I'd want to even if I could. If there was ever a plan for my life then I misunderstood and started running so fast in the wrong direction that I can't even begin to remember what brought me to these decisions, but I'm believing less and less in a plan each year. Its been so long since I've felt your voice in my ear and this city keeps making it harder for me to hear. Or maybe I need to learn how to listen because lately I seem to be missing everyone and everything.

I used to have a family. I used to know who my friends were and who was there for me, but now I'm stuck here in this city missing everyone and everything.I miss Matthew. I miss Ethan. I miss Ryan. I miss Billy. I miss Justin. I miss DJ. I miss thinking that he was friendly. I miss Chelsea. I miss Cassie. I miss Samm and I miss Katie. I miss Tara. I miss the Ali's. I miss Erica. I miss Shelby. I miss camping. I miss road trips. I miss rooftops. I miss movies. I miss night walks. I miss beaches. I miss yard sales. I miss laughing. I miss long talks. I miss music and I miss singing. I miss that feeling of being loved and, God, I miss praying. I miss not missing anyone or missing anything I miss knowing who my friends were and who was there for me. I miss my family. I used to think that I was sad, but now I miss when I was happy.

So I'm left wondering if those old friends get the same feeling as me when the trees start to grow back their leaves. If they feel the same pull for July with a hope in their eye, not because something is coming, but because it used to and, friends, I hope that moves you. I hope it motivates a way to be the change that we used to want to see in this world. Like the love that we gave away to lovers who never understood our cause in a world that still doesn't know who we are.